phthalombrage | (no subject)

Letter to founding KGB RecSec re: this weekend:

Dear Jay,

Thanks so much for coordinating the KGB 20th Anniversary party! I could see how much work and effort you put into it, and would appreciate if you could somehow forward these thanks to am40 and the many others who had large roles in making this event possible. It was really classy, and I enjoyed myself greatly.

I am the youngest member of KGB who attended this weekend’s events, as the only current KGB freshman there. I would like to share with you what the KGB means to me, as someone who joined the organization in its twentieth year, who was born in July of ’89. And guess what, my AndrewID has but three characters: ntr. (It’s pronounced “en-ter”, I swear. Not “neuter”.)

I stumbled upon stories of the adventures of the CMU KGB online during my college search last year on some random websites. I remember finding the rules of CTFWS and finding them quite complicated, but wanting to hide out in corners of Wean myself. Since I didn’t apply to that many schools anyway and never actually expected to end up in Pittsburgh, the knowledge that a friendly, mischievous band of nerds awaited me at Carnegie Mellon was a significant contributing factor to my decision to apply. These were exactly the sort of people I had hoped to meet in college. I had no idea I would eventually sit in a room with the members of this organization, befriend its present officers, and even meet some of its founders!

When, much to my surprise, I arrived on campus for the first time during Orientation Week , still accustomed to the Florida swampland, I eventually wandered into this wonderful concrete castle called Wean, about which the Internet had told me so many enticing things. Posted on one of the bulletin boards was a flyer with pictures of old-fashioned woodcuts of men on tall bicycles announcing the KGB Scavenger Hunt that was apparently happening right then. I was delighted by the weird poster and disappointed to have missed the event, but took note of when and where it said General Body meetings took place.

The first meeting I attended scared me shitless. The room was packed with more people than I expected, and everyone made references to various obscure aspects of geekery and inside jokes I hadn’t yet learned. I felt so normal; these people were freaks. I didn’t expect so many people to all know each other, and was really nervous when asked to stand up and introduce myself. I remember that uninterestingly, I had a squirrel on a chain around my neck… sadly, it wasn’t real. I had no idea what was going on and everyone else seemed to. But there was an event on Friday, a potluck on Flagstaff Hill, and I had made up my mind to go.

I showed up at Kirr Commons clutching little tupperwares of rice noodles, wearing the ridiculous blue triangular Donner House backpack they had given us during Orientation. The current 2nd VP commented on it, not making fun of it as I had expected, but just generally laughing about how it was blue and triangular. When we got out to the hill, I sat alone and was amazed that people came over and tried to talk to me. I was a little creeped out and paranoid, but eventually it occurred to me that this particular social activity, unlike most others, was actually rather nice. I was also pleased that the current 1st veep asked me if what I had made was vegetarian, and I said of course it was, I was one of those too. So there was even food for me at this potluck! I didn’t just have to eat chips and hot dog buns. Then people started jousting with huge sticks and climbing up concrete pillars. I even tried my hand at the stick-jousting thing when someone invited me to. These were great people! They were friendly and considerate and did fun things… I was so going to the next meeting and bringing friends.

That I did! I wanted to understand how these meetings worked and learn more about these strange and fascinating people. I eagerly stepped up to help write puzzles for their puzzle hunt, regularly attended events, meetings, and soon Exec meetings, and traveled to Cambridge with some members for the XKCD meet-up, but it took me a few months to muster the courage to venture into the Linux cluster where KGB members also spend a lot of action-packed hours. Before I knew it, I felt perfectly at home amidst these ”nerds, geeks, freaks, visionaries, outcasts and ne'er-do-wells”, who are perhaps the best thing about CMU, in my humble opinion. I had found my place in the universe, and was no longer as frightened by the enthusiastic, outgoing Orientation Counselors or the football players who incidentally lived on my floor. (Shawn’s rendition of CMU cheers at the Underground Tour greatly assuaged my worries about sports at Carnegie Mellon.) I currently work in Admissions calling prospective students, and I am always overjoyed when I come across a student with whom I can drop the silly Admissions propaganda of “you can have a normal college experience at CMU; it’s just a lot of work all the time” and instead discuss the antics of that glorious organization, the KGB, hoping they will be as charmed as I was and appear early next semester for indoctrination into the ways of the Party.

This weekend, though, was seriously awesome. I manned the sign-in sheet on Friday and was amazed by all the names I recognized from older people’s stories and the wiki. I also observed that some people wandered in looking a little intimidated by the crowd, a characteristic I share, and that they then encountered old friends and smiled genuinely. Some appeared to be perfectly respectable members of society, but were wearing a Co-Ed Naked Brockian Ultra-Cricket jersey or that old KGB Buggy shirt emblazoned with an image of computer printouts. And the KGB munchkins are so adorable! I am curious as to what they will be like (smart is already a given), if they too will join the KGB. To think that KGB defectors would go out into the world, find jobs, form families, reproduce– and as much as they may look like normal adults to the untrained eye, they still have this zany spark inside them. I didn’t feel so much like I was 18 and some of these people were almost old enough to be my parents or just further along than I was in life, with different concerns – there was an ageless quality about them; they didn’t condescend to me or grumble TOO much about how everything was better in their halcyon day. I had expected people to break off more distinctly into groups based on era and that socialization in general would probably be strained. Neither of these happened. Selling T-shirts, I was enthralled when people walked up and explained that they had designed the original run of Carnegie Hellon shirts, that the designer of the Stress at Carnegie Mellon shirt was present, and that the latter shirt could no longer be reprinted for reasons of copyright infringement. As corny as it sounds, I felt like a part of something greater than myself.

Saturday’s lunch was also fantastic. I was initially sitting at a table whose only other occupant was our current Treasurer, who wasn’t sure either where to go when told to find a table, but more people had joined us by the time we got back with food, older members who laughed at the same jokes during committee reports. People jumped out of their chairs to partake in crazy shenanigans (in a hotel where unsuspecting citizens stay!), the memorabilia was impressive, and the stories of the story-telling committee were hilarious. Apart from just being cool, all this really resounded with me. We all share a common experience as past and present (both if you’re Shawn Knight) CMU students, nerds, comrades in the KGB, a really special group of people that fits together nicer than I expected. I was kind of depressed to be missing most of my first Carnival (except of course move-on and teardown) due to an awful Civil Engineering project , a tough programming assignment, and a desperate apartment search because everything on CMU’s campus is so “thanking” expensive, but amongst all of these people – all of these /friends/, whether I knew them personally or not, I could relax and enjoy an excellent weekend.

I love the KGB. This is not something I say lightly. Speaking as an awkward, jaded teenager cynical about practically everything, I sincerely love the KGB, and I would just like to thank you and all the other founding members for creating an organization to embody all that the KGB is about, whatever that is. I am also exceedingly grateful to all of KGB’s membership for creating and carrying on the bizarre traditions that give us our unique reputation on campus. The lady at the Career Center who went over my resume suggested that I just delete the reference to the KGB, but I am instead looking forward to explaining what exactly the KGB is to future employers and sharing in that experience as well. I look forward to coming back to the next reunion, whether it be the 25th the 30th or the (n+1)th. Hopefully you won’t have to deal with the stress of running that one, too!

Many, many thanks,

Nicole Reilly (ntr),
small female freshling (Class of 2011, heh)