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Oct. 21st, 2004 10:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
phthalombrageI just made a long post about my recent state of mind and dreams that I don't want to retype. The browser window closed and I think it's an omen.
Anyway, my mind is disturbing, and my dreams even more so. Never a nightmare, but shocking nonetheless.
Also, I seem to have an inborn sense of detecting my TA kids. I saw like half the class on their way to the buses this afternoon... my eyes instantly glued. Unless.. they were looking at me first. When you stare at people they somehow notice. They're good kids, cute and stuff. I feel bad grading their homework and tests because they're smart, but they turn things in without checking them and make silly errors that lower the grade a lot. I'm starting to learn their handwriting and names a lot better. I sound so simple like my mom.
History intrigues me for motives. Cause and effect. I am slow and stolid right now. Chop. Chop. Ted Tuffy and Rexina running around Europe. I need to do my mag review and study some more for the essay test tomorrow. Probably other stuff I may or may not ignore, but somehow I'll come out on top. Hopefully I won't lose touch.
Ah yes. My brother threw a roach (dead, thank god) at me that landed in my mouth. I chased him out of the house, halfway down the street, caught up to him, and proceeded to smack him. I was barefoot, which hurt pounding onto the warm, hard cement, but I'm glad that I can still outrun him. I wonder if he used to try not to fight me because I was a girl because I beat him at that too. I'm manly and pessismistic and evil. I eat nasty food. My parents keep forgetting to make dinner, and I end up having a pack or pop-tarts or something out of a can. I'm going to die soon. Driving is empowering.
Anyway, my mind is disturbing, and my dreams even more so. Never a nightmare, but shocking nonetheless.
Also, I seem to have an inborn sense of detecting my TA kids. I saw like half the class on their way to the buses this afternoon... my eyes instantly glued. Unless.. they were looking at me first. When you stare at people they somehow notice. They're good kids, cute and stuff. I feel bad grading their homework and tests because they're smart, but they turn things in without checking them and make silly errors that lower the grade a lot. I'm starting to learn their handwriting and names a lot better. I sound so simple like my mom.
History intrigues me for motives. Cause and effect. I am slow and stolid right now. Chop. Chop. Ted Tuffy and Rexina running around Europe. I need to do my mag review and study some more for the essay test tomorrow. Probably other stuff I may or may not ignore, but somehow I'll come out on top. Hopefully I won't lose touch.
Ah yes. My brother threw a roach (dead, thank god) at me that landed in my mouth. I chased him out of the house, halfway down the street, caught up to him, and proceeded to smack him. I was barefoot, which hurt pounding onto the warm, hard cement, but I'm glad that I can still outrun him. I wonder if he used to try not to fight me because I was a girl because I beat him at that too. I'm manly and pessismistic and evil. I eat nasty food. My parents keep forgetting to make dinner, and I end up having a pack or pop-tarts or something out of a can. I'm going to die soon. Driving is empowering.
